Shoddy Blog Maintenance

Ok - so I checked the date of my last post (I actually think I would post more often if I didn't feel pressure to use captial letters and punctuation) - that being said, I have had a relapse of neck pain and it has affected my blogging. HOWEVER, I have been flying quite a bit lately, and I think it is important to share my experiences.

For starters, I went to see a doctor in Cleveland. After getting NO good news, we returned to the airport, ready to fly home, in tears. At first, I was mortified to be openly crying in the airport over lunch but then I realized that the airport can totally be an acceptable place to shed a tear! I looked at J and said, "Don't worry, honey. We can openly cry here - people will just think we flew in for a funeral..."

Ok...I am SO glad Yigit (I refuse to pronounce any other way but Yih-Jit) won Flaming Top Chef. I really didn't care who won but when it became a choice between awful Morgan (who is the gayest dude ever, as evidenced by referring to himself and SETH as the only straight guys in the house) and Danielle, she of the sunken chin - did she have no bottom teeth? Is that why the chin was sunken? How did she get so far after using vegetables for one challenge on Top Chef PASTRY?? And by the other way (not to be confused with "by the by"), I am writing this entry FROM a plane!! How awesome is that? AND...I am listening to Jason Castro on my ipod while I write this entry from plane. LOVE it!! Now that I truly think about it, however, I am also glad that Heather didn't win. Not Heather with the bandaid on her forehead covering up a helluva scar, but Asian, bitter Heather. I wouldn't have minded flaming Zac (Zack?), because the celebration would have been AMAZING, but Iwas not a fan of angry Heather. And I think I also was not a fan of "Team Go Diva" - really??? I mean, it was clever and everything, but it just highlighted the sheer ridiculosity of the show!! I think I was rooting for the baker who, although gay, was unceremoniously excluded from Team Go Diva, which is kind of bullshit, no? I just need to address that Flaming Top Chef is in stiff competition with The Bachelor(ette) for my favorite show (although Dexter really has to be up there since I love rooting for a serial killer!).

At any rate, back to plane travel. SO....we get on the plane in DC earlier this week (I'm not sure this story is going to translate without the expressions but I'll give it a whirl) - I am hoping, as always, that nobody "heavy" is sitting next to me. I was pleased to see a young, relatively good-looking young dude in my row, until I catch a gander of the intense stare he is sending my way. It seemed somewhat analytical, as if he was thinking, "Can I confide in this one? I REALLY need soemone to talk to...." In short, the answer to question number one was YES - I was a worthy listener, and boy did he ever want to talk!! J had bought me a 5-Guys burger for the plane ride, and as I start to unwrap it, Intensity is looking at me like I am unwrapping soon to be wife of Prince William's engagement ring straight off the finger of Princess Di. He says, "Is that a burger??" What could I say but, "Yes - do you want some of it?" What coud he say but, "Are you serious?", as a bit of drool fell from his lips. I said yes and gave him half of the burger which he devoured with a dreamy look on his face. I come to find out (after he rejected the French Fries with the reasoning, "I can't eat potatoes for a while") that he is returning from a 13-month stint in the Congo. That's not the worst of this guy's story - he flew to DC on Ethiopia Air, where apparently, a passenger died on the flight and Intensity was the only "medical personnel" on the plane, being a paramedic. He told us that he couldn't save the guy, that Ethiopia Air is shoddy, that the defibrillator was broken, and that if they had let the plane land in Maine, he might have had a shot to save the life. While he is telling the story, he is systematically pulling out various items that were bestowed on him by Ethiopia Air as thanks for attempting to save one of their passengers. A few blankets and a pillow, for example. He was VERY upset. He then proceeds to show us his passport picture which, apparently, was 45 lbs ago - weight he lost in the Congo. He is returning home and will attend Counseling for 2 months, before deciding whether or not to return to the Congo for another stint. His next question, "Do you have any CHEWING gum?" Yep - I gave him some chewing gum.... He then announced that he had taken a Valium, would be passing out for the remainder of the flight, leaned forward, wrapped in Ethiopia Air blankets, with an arm on my tray table and slept the rest of the way. What a seatmate! I might have to change my view on the heavies...

I'm back and soon, The Bachelor will be too!!!