Wednesday, March 3, 2010

I can't top the title of the last post...

SO....I feel like I need to continue my updates on AI since I have a fan! Is it me, or are there a lot of little boys in this year's competition? And do they all have "comb-forwards"? I don't get the "comb-forward" and no matter how adorable "I'm adorable but I suck at singing even though Simon complimented me this week" is, he is terrible. And even though I am not impressed with either of the black guys thus far, I kind of love them. I think Todrick looks like a drag queen and what more can I say about "I rocks the onesie" that he hasn't already said about himself?!

I still love Andrew Garcia (is that his name?) even though his performance was rough this week and I am just not a fan of the dude with the long, blonde hair. I just don't like boys with long hair... Interestingly, I do like girls with long hair - well, one girl with long hair. The thing about short hair (on girls or guys) is that you can't hide anything about your appearance. If a chick can pull off short hair, she is usually gorgeous (or a lesbian, or a gorgeous lesbian) and if a guy is hiding behind long hair, he usually isn't (gorgeous, he definitely isn't a lesbian).

I was impressed, yet again, by "No, I am not Adam Lambert's brother" and the little churchie country singing dude who looks about 8 years old. I want to hate both of them, but they are both really good. And by far, the best comment of the night (no, nothing about bananas) was Ellen saying something to the effect of, "Underneath that mullet, there is a really good singer!" I LOVE that she is addressing the mullet - for that alone, she is a good judge. Looking forward to the ladies tonight but I can't believe the chick I love has yellow teeth and is named BOWERSOX. It's a travesty for me to root for someone with yellow teeth but hey, what can I do?

As for the other show...WHY WOULD ANYONE DECIDE TO TRAIN WITH BOB?? Year after year after year, psychiatric advice and all, Jillian trains the winner. For God's sake - she turned Helen into the winner! And last night after Michael, who looks like a 60-year old fat woman, stacked his blue team (except for the fact that Bob is the trainer), Jillian managed to train the black team to glory. I am SO happy to see angry Miggy go because the sourpuss face was starting to really aggravate me, but I would have been happier to see Lance go. Why does he suck at weight loss? And, please tell me how Miggy and Michael got to be so close?? What a strange friendship!!! Does anyone think they might have been sleeping together? Is anything more appallingly disgusting than that image?

I think I would sell my first born to be trained (and counseled) by Jillian. Dammit.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

First of all, Michael is gayer than gay. Yes, he looks like a 60 year old woman, but he acts like a total woman! He connected with Miggy because she was the only Puerto Rican (but not Puerto Rican), and he is the only gay dude. Who cries more than Michael? AND how could pink even think about an alliance with purple and grey. Didn't she think "oh, wait, my mom is on this team." dumbass.
I would train with Bob. I don't want her crawling on my treadmill like a spider and asking me what it feels like to be fat. It's awesome Jill, really awesome.

terrible said...

Bowersox is a terrible name. And I am terrible, therefore I love her AND her yellow teeth.

I have no idea who Bob is, and only know Jillian because she sells bad diet pills and is getting sued. But based on Ilyce's comments alone, I would train with Bob. I hate spiders, especially those who get on the treadmill with me and ask how it feel to be fat. I would smush her with my water bottle.

terrible said...

OK, I caught this week's Bowersox performance and I am shocked, SHOCKED that you have commented on the yellow teeth, but not the missing teeth?!?