OK.......I have been getting flack from fans although only one fan has actually responded to my fabulous blogging skills. I have to warn you, I am angry these days. Besides the fact that my diet includes a regular dose of Vicodin (which wouldn't be a bad thing if I were taking it for PLEASURE), I had to put my dog to sleep. I can't get over it. And, I am so sick of the fucking people who think I should be over it in 2 seconds. It's "just" a dog but frankly, I like my dogs better than most people. They don't talk back, they love unconditionally and they never remember why they are mad at you. And they are REALLY cute. And no matter how much time you may want to spend in bed, they don't give you shit - just lay in the bed with you.
On a different note, I caught a couple episodes of "The Two Coreys" the other night. While I am impressed that these two have managed to capitalize again on a career that ended 20 years ago, I am appalled by the Coreys. I am also even more impressed by the child stars who have managed to become adult TV stars. Like "Rick" Schroeder. Or Jason Bateman. Even the Olsen twins have pulled off something. On the other hand, Boner never made it anywhere. BONER...how did they get away with that?? And what ever happened to the Double Trouble twins? Of course, Clooney was on that show and he certainly made it!
Back to the Coreys. First of all, what exactly did Corey Feldman ever do besides be one of the Coreys and get addicted to drugs? Stand By Me?? At least Haim had Lucas to his credit. Feldman has truly made the most of his shoddy child film career by taking advantage of Haim. And with that being said, what the hell happened to Haim?? He is a MESS and Feldman is the most acceptable former child star ever (now that he is off the drugs). Haim has turned into Puck! Has anyone seen this show? Haim is SO Puck.
Ok - I guess I should work a little....from bed. It's almost time for a Vicodin.
One more thing - I have decided from watching Intervention that drug addicts are much more entertaining than alcoholics. The alcoholics are sloppy and mean and it hurts to watch them drink a half gallon of alcohol. Drug addicts, on the other hand, are MUCH more entertaining. They even sell their bodies for drugs!
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Inspiration from Terrible
Ok - so I got SUCKED in to The Bachelorette a couple of weeks ago - the week BEFORE the hometown visits. No, the week of the hometown visits. Anyway, the chick was SO into Graham(?), and so NOT into the others, it was ridiculous. There was no way she was picking, "My parents died when I was young, I cried at Dodgers stadium and now I'm an open book" OR "I'm hot and nice but I already have a kid whose mother dumped me".
She was REALLY into "I'm hot but I can't open up" who turned into "I'm hot but I can't open up until you dump me and I give you a letter that tells you how I feel". As with HK, that episode turned out to be the best, because who really gave a shit after that? And how could they never tell us what the letter said - or did they? And why wasn't he on "After the final Rose???" We knew she was going to pick "I snowboard, wore some weird pink outfit on day one and am SO DIFFERENT from every guy Deanna has ever dated including Jason and Jeremy". And her choice seemed very right after Jeremy went psycho and then trailed them to the Bahamas for some bizarre final plea which I didn't see.
I do have to say, though, that Jason sort of won me over and I will be SHOCKED if he is not the next bachelor. And if he isn't, it is SO because he has a kid. He is hot and took the dumping so graciously (after getting down on a knee and being picked back up) and he kept wishing Deanna and surfer-dude the best blah blah blah. Plus, his heart has been re-opened... I love these reality shows.
As for HK, I was pretty disappointed in the finale but could I have been more right about Christina (who looks an awful lot like our Christina) winning? First of all, he needed to pick a young and GoRam would NEVER pick a short, fat, sloppy old guy, no matter how good of a cook he is. I do have to give some credit to Petrozza for picking Jen over Matt - it was VERY mature. Jen may be a selfish bitch (loved when she asked GoRam for a reference) but she is not a PSYCHO. Matt is absolutely ridiculous and the fact that Tina completed a service with him as a team member is very impressive. I LOVED how she manipulated him with the risotto bit. He totally went for it.
I'm not so sure GoRam will be siked when he realizes that Tina was only working hard for the HK episodes and plans to skate by at "London". Something tells me the expectations will be high. I am so bummed that the show is over, though. At least I can look forward to Kitchen Nightmares. I LOVE these British opinionated assholes who are really softies underneath. Did you see GoRam give Petrozza a big hug behind the locked door while Christina was out celebrating with her "troubled mother"?
Terrible - I can't believe you were sharing photo booth pics with Susan Fine and the other honest old Jews at the shower. And True92 - TRUE that I was talking about you. Do you remember your comment about somebody's mother at the shower? Something to the effect of,
"Has she stopped eating since the last time I saw her??" POLITE. She was a damn good photographer, I must say...
She was REALLY into "I'm hot but I can't open up" who turned into "I'm hot but I can't open up until you dump me and I give you a letter that tells you how I feel". As with HK, that episode turned out to be the best, because who really gave a shit after that? And how could they never tell us what the letter said - or did they? And why wasn't he on "After the final Rose???" We knew she was going to pick "I snowboard, wore some weird pink outfit on day one and am SO DIFFERENT from every guy Deanna has ever dated including Jason and Jeremy". And her choice seemed very right after Jeremy went psycho and then trailed them to the Bahamas for some bizarre final plea which I didn't see.
I do have to say, though, that Jason sort of won me over and I will be SHOCKED if he is not the next bachelor. And if he isn't, it is SO because he has a kid. He is hot and took the dumping so graciously (after getting down on a knee and being picked back up) and he kept wishing Deanna and surfer-dude the best blah blah blah. Plus, his heart has been re-opened... I love these reality shows.
As for HK, I was pretty disappointed in the finale but could I have been more right about Christina (who looks an awful lot like our Christina) winning? First of all, he needed to pick a young and GoRam would NEVER pick a short, fat, sloppy old guy, no matter how good of a cook he is. I do have to give some credit to Petrozza for picking Jen over Matt - it was VERY mature. Jen may be a selfish bitch (loved when she asked GoRam for a reference) but she is not a PSYCHO. Matt is absolutely ridiculous and the fact that Tina completed a service with him as a team member is very impressive. I LOVED how she manipulated him with the risotto bit. He totally went for it.
I'm not so sure GoRam will be siked when he realizes that Tina was only working hard for the HK episodes and plans to skate by at "London". Something tells me the expectations will be high. I am so bummed that the show is over, though. At least I can look forward to Kitchen Nightmares. I LOVE these British opinionated assholes who are really softies underneath. Did you see GoRam give Petrozza a big hug behind the locked door while Christina was out celebrating with her "troubled mother"?
Terrible - I can't believe you were sharing photo booth pics with Susan Fine and the other honest old Jews at the shower. And True92 - TRUE that I was talking about you. Do you remember your comment about somebody's mother at the shower? Something to the effect of,
"Has she stopped eating since the last time I saw her??" POLITE. She was a damn good photographer, I must say...
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Hell
I am SO disappointed in the HK "finale" which wasn't even the finale. For crying out loud - is it THAT much of a cliffhanger as to whether Petrozza chooses Matt or Jen as his last team member? Am I mistaken or did last season's HK finale have a bitter black chick who was trying to sabotage one of the finalists?
Christina has gotten WAY too big for her britches. She hates the stripes, has the challenge "in the bag", blah blah blah. I realize TV is trying to make her look bad since she does have the HK competition "in the bag" but still, she IS saying this stuff. And the executive chef/tasters were ridiculous! Seasoning sucks, meat isn't cooked right, risotto is too chewy...I pick, hard choice, Petrozza. The fact that I know how to spell Petrozza is ridiculous. And how is it even remotely acceptable that GoRam isn't a judge??
Anyway, the reward for winning the challenge sucked. Of course Petrozza is going to pick "The General" and of course Christina is going to pick Corey. Am I mistaken or did Christina and Corey HATE each other in the beginning. Now they're all about teamwork and beating Petrozza. It just has a feeling of unreality, doesn't it? And what about the 9 hour recap in the beginning of EVERY SINGLE EPISODE? Ridiculous.
I'm pissed but of course, I will watch finale, part 2, next week... Hopefully, it is more entertaining than part 1.
Christina has gotten WAY too big for her britches. She hates the stripes, has the challenge "in the bag", blah blah blah. I realize TV is trying to make her look bad since she does have the HK competition "in the bag" but still, she IS saying this stuff. And the executive chef/tasters were ridiculous! Seasoning sucks, meat isn't cooked right, risotto is too chewy...I pick, hard choice, Petrozza. The fact that I know how to spell Petrozza is ridiculous. And how is it even remotely acceptable that GoRam isn't a judge??
Anyway, the reward for winning the challenge sucked. Of course Petrozza is going to pick "The General" and of course Christina is going to pick Corey. Am I mistaken or did Christina and Corey HATE each other in the beginning. Now they're all about teamwork and beating Petrozza. It just has a feeling of unreality, doesn't it? And what about the 9 hour recap in the beginning of EVERY SINGLE EPISODE? Ridiculous.
I'm pissed but of course, I will watch finale, part 2, next week... Hopefully, it is more entertaining than part 1.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Rekindling the Blog
Ok - so I got a lot of flack for shoddy blogging and here I am. Luckily, I have a LOT of material after my bridal shower AND a new episode of Hell's Kitchen.
Bridal showers are RIDICULOUS. A bunch of women pigging out while gaping at the bride (or in this case, brides) as they open gifts. Granted - it's great to be the bride but also a lot of pressure. I learned this weekend that a "commitment shower", which is what we GAYS have, is less pressure on the bride because there are two of us. I learned that alcohol helps quite a lot to get through the shower. And I learned that being watched is much more difficult when you don't have a Powerpoint presentation to hide behind.
I also learned that "wedding Christmas" is awesome. You are never too old to open gifts. NEVER. And, even though we registered for the gifts, we still LOVED opening every one of them.
The best comment at the shower and I SWEAR this is true. One of the "ladies" said to me, "I just farted in somebody's face." My mouth dropped open as I replied, "On purpose?" No, she replied, "It just slipped out." I asked, "Did she know??" "Yes...I said excuse me." I LOVE IT.
Ok - we also had a lot of fun writing some thank you notes. Just a few...
"Thank you so much for the wooden bowl we DIDN'T register for. Oh wait - it's a cheaper version of the one we wanted. Thanks!!"
"Thank you for coming to celebrate with us. I haven't seen you in a while - you look like shit!!" (polite)
"Thank you so much for the wonderful gift. How much did you shrink since the last time I saw you?"
POLITE.
Bridal showers are RIDICULOUS. A bunch of women pigging out while gaping at the bride (or in this case, brides) as they open gifts. Granted - it's great to be the bride but also a lot of pressure. I learned this weekend that a "commitment shower", which is what we GAYS have, is less pressure on the bride because there are two of us. I learned that alcohol helps quite a lot to get through the shower. And I learned that being watched is much more difficult when you don't have a Powerpoint presentation to hide behind.
I also learned that "wedding Christmas" is awesome. You are never too old to open gifts. NEVER. And, even though we registered for the gifts, we still LOVED opening every one of them.
The best comment at the shower and I SWEAR this is true. One of the "ladies" said to me, "I just farted in somebody's face." My mouth dropped open as I replied, "On purpose?" No, she replied, "It just slipped out." I asked, "Did she know??" "Yes...I said excuse me." I LOVE IT.
Ok - we also had a lot of fun writing some thank you notes. Just a few...
"Thank you so much for the wooden bowl we DIDN'T register for. Oh wait - it's a cheaper version of the one we wanted. Thanks!!"
"Thank you for coming to celebrate with us. I haven't seen you in a while - you look like shit!!" (polite)
"Thank you so much for the wonderful gift. How much did you shrink since the last time I saw you?"
POLITE.
Monday, June 23, 2008
LOVE Hell
I haven't written in a while - been very busy with work, which SUCKS. Anyway, I am still loving Hell's Kitchen. I'm a little sad that Jen is gone - she was very entertaining. I love "I'm the best even though I never win the challenges". And "I cook good risotto the first time and crappy risotto 2 seconds later". Does anyone even like risotto? It's such a staple of this place!
I can't believe Petroza has managed to make it this far. He's fat and filthy but apparently a very good chef. There is NO way he is going to win this thing. I think it has to be Christina but I think maybe Petroza is the best cook. Can you imagine him as your boss in the kitchen? RIDICULOUS.
Ok - short and sweet. Can't wait for Hell this week.
I can't believe Petroza has managed to make it this far. He's fat and filthy but apparently a very good chef. There is NO way he is going to win this thing. I think it has to be Christina but I think maybe Petroza is the best cook. Can you imagine him as your boss in the kitchen? RIDICULOUS.
Ok - short and sweet. Can't wait for Hell this week.
Friday, May 9, 2008
Where Have I Been??
You know what's nice about blogging - I actually have a chance to miss myself... I need to delve into AI a little bit before I start on my new favorite show, "Hell's Kitchen". I must say that my little dred-lock guy HAD to go this week. Not only was his rendition of Bob Marley TERRIBLE, but he was a mess on the elimination show and was relieved he didn't have to come back because he wouldn't have to memorize THREE songs. Dumb as a rock - meanwhile, little lip-licker is belting out Elvis songs and while he is extraordinarily annoying, at least he can memorize his songs.
Why isn't Syesha getting any credit for
A - being good?
B - being beautiful?
Granted - she looked a bit whorish in her Tina Turner outfit but she PULLED it off. Meanwhile, the "tight pants boys brigade" is looking ridiculous with their chapped lips, yellow teeth and mysterious hairdos. This chick is bringing the beauty AND the voice every time. All that said, David Cook should win because he really is the only one with a future. Archuletta needs to go Disney (and gay), Syesha should go Broadway or TV, and Dred-lock needs to go to college and smoke pot 8 times per day.
On a new note, does anyone watch Hell's Kitchen?? I love this show. I don't even know where to begin. My favorite line this week about tall blond in reference to the little Vietnamese dude, "I mean he's barely 4 feet tall and I'm 6 feet tall. It's NOT happening." I LOVE the way Gordon Ramsey says Fuck Off instead of Goodnight. And I am supremely entertained by the number of DUMBasses who can cook. First of all, what the hell kind of name is Petroza and why is he NEVER on the chopping block? If I saw that man cooking my food, I would run for the exit. And Ben is dumb as a rock - none of them can speak and the little guy really IS 4 feet tall AND stupid.
My favorite/least favorite, though, without question, is Matt. CLOSE YOUR MOUTH. I do feel bad for those people who just can't close their mouths but this guy is going to immediately sign up for Extreme Makeover when he sees himself on TV. Now that Gordon Ramsey has joined Simon Cowell as one of the most accurate observers on TV, I think I may want to move to London. Or England, whatever - you HAVE to watch this show. It is priceless.
So, I play on a co-ed softball team and 3 of the guys have had babies in the last 2 years. 3 boys - the names....Jack (reasonable), Desmond (a bit odd) and Hugo (are you kidding me???). Now I realize people are going for original names and all but do these guys really not notice that they are blatantly picking the names of "LOST" characters? And if not after Jack which is a common name, how can you name your kid Hugo after the last announcement was of Desmond??? Ridiculous. But, I love it...
Why isn't Syesha getting any credit for
A - being good?
B - being beautiful?
Granted - she looked a bit whorish in her Tina Turner outfit but she PULLED it off. Meanwhile, the "tight pants boys brigade" is looking ridiculous with their chapped lips, yellow teeth and mysterious hairdos. This chick is bringing the beauty AND the voice every time. All that said, David Cook should win because he really is the only one with a future. Archuletta needs to go Disney (and gay), Syesha should go Broadway or TV, and Dred-lock needs to go to college and smoke pot 8 times per day.
On a new note, does anyone watch Hell's Kitchen?? I love this show. I don't even know where to begin. My favorite line this week about tall blond in reference to the little Vietnamese dude, "I mean he's barely 4 feet tall and I'm 6 feet tall. It's NOT happening." I LOVE the way Gordon Ramsey says Fuck Off instead of Goodnight. And I am supremely entertained by the number of DUMBasses who can cook. First of all, what the hell kind of name is Petroza and why is he NEVER on the chopping block? If I saw that man cooking my food, I would run for the exit. And Ben is dumb as a rock - none of them can speak and the little guy really IS 4 feet tall AND stupid.
My favorite/least favorite, though, without question, is Matt. CLOSE YOUR MOUTH. I do feel bad for those people who just can't close their mouths but this guy is going to immediately sign up for Extreme Makeover when he sees himself on TV. Now that Gordon Ramsey has joined Simon Cowell as one of the most accurate observers on TV, I think I may want to move to London. Or England, whatever - you HAVE to watch this show. It is priceless.
So, I play on a co-ed softball team and 3 of the guys have had babies in the last 2 years. 3 boys - the names....Jack (reasonable), Desmond (a bit odd) and Hugo (are you kidding me???). Now I realize people are going for original names and all but do these guys really not notice that they are blatantly picking the names of "LOST" characters? And if not after Jack which is a common name, how can you name your kid Hugo after the last announcement was of Desmond??? Ridiculous. But, I love it...
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